This
year has been an adventurous one, filled with both achievements and failures. Oh wait,
perhaps I shouldn’t use the word achievement, it sounds overly glorified and
glamorous. May be I should just use the word, milestone. Yeah, milestone sounds
more appropriate, more like a never ending journey of learning and growing. Some
of you might have heard about me taking on an unusual path of life. When many
of my peers are fighting for promotions and climbing the corporate ladder and
even started travelling around the world, I just have to be the rebellious one
doing the total opposite. The reason why is simple, I want to experience it.
I’ve always knew that,
nothing comes easy, but maybe sometimes, we really have no choice but to face
the reality. And the reality is? We need money for food and shelter to survive.
Without money, dreams are BS. I once stumbled upon a candid quote from one of
the co-founders from ServiceHero, she says “Dreams are free. The hustle,
however, is sold separately.” How true is that!
To
summarise, this year I hit two milestones. 1) I’ve successfully gotten my CFPTM
licence after studying part time for 1.5 years (usual timeline would be 2 years) and; 2) Got featured on one of
the Top Tech Lifestyle Medias in SEA. Sounds macam yes? Truth be told, failures
that I’ve had faced are waaaaaaaaay more! But, I’m not gonna spell them out
here because I don’t want my post to sound like super emo. Yeah, this is our
world today, is it not? Everything posted online is all about the good side of
life, no one wants to talk about shit. Not sure if you have watched this
before, but just wanna share this video here:
Are you
living an Insta Life?
Don’t
misjudge me. I’m not saying that I’m one of them in the video above. I’ve never
posted anything online just for the sake of showing off, or make people feel
jealous of me or something like that. I post only when I feel like it. And, the
reason why I only choose to post positive things online is because I prefer to
spread positivity than negativity (except my IG Stories which sometimes might appear to be rather emo but its ok 'cause it's gonna disappear anyway). It has always been my motto for having a
blog since day one. Anyway, before I got carried away, I better stop babbling
around anymore lol.. Here goes my yearly routine:
Dear Jimui,
How have
you been? Not sure if you still remember our promise of having year end
vacation together lol.. But I understand that sometimes things just don’t work
out the way we planned. As you are working hard to survive in the corporate
world, and I on the other hand have been busying exploring the alternative of
it, it’s quite inevitable that our friendship has gone a bit further apart. We
no longer share the same topics that we once did. We used to talk a lot about
dramas and travelling! But because of me rebellious decision, my circumstances
had not allowed me for that kind of luxurious and I’m sorry for that. But I’m
glad to know that you have recently visited EU with your family! Hope that one
day we could travel again and please be my tour guide ok? :D
I hope that
next year we are able to meet up more often? It has been ages since we last
hangout and I miss the time we spent together! Beep me up ok? J
Dear Gor,
To be
honest, I once thought that you would never appear in my blog again. In other
words, I thought I would never write letters to you again. Last year was a
difficult one for me, making decisions that were against my heart because I
couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t stand the way I was being treated and I
couldn’t stand to see you like trapped in the middle like that. Actually, you
are one of the reasons I registered for the meditation camp. I heard a lot of
my friends said that it helps them to find peace by letting go. Then I figured,
perhaps I could really use that and as time passed, I did feel better.
You know? I would never in my wildest dreams have thought that we could be back
together again. I was so ready to bury you away that I thought we would
disappear from each other’s life and never see each other again but here we are.
Thanks for being patient with me as I learn to express myself better and to be
more open up. Thanks for offering your help to salvage my venture when it has
nothing to do with you at all (but it makes me feel very bad as well).
Maybe these
kind of bad feelings have been there all along, just that I didn’t really
notice them until they resurfaced again. What happened during dinner that day
brought back so so much negative emotions from the past. You said you
understand, but do you know which part of the past exactly? I bet you don’t (I
don’t expect you to anyway). The way you bombarding me made me felt like I’ve
done something very wrong and I deserved to be hung. The way you behaved was
exactly the same as last time. You did all sort of things and draw the lines,
set the rules, to make sure that I won’t cross them again next time. After all
these years, what is in your blood is still in your blood. Nothing has changed.
You made me felt like I was being trained as a dog to be obedient and it made
me felt very awful. You made me felt like you are always more superior and that there will always have this gap between us.
I don’t
know why I can always be so carefree and sampat and crazy when I’m with some of
my closest friends but I can’t be like that when I’m with you. It’s like, I
always need to behave myself properly so that I won’t embarrass you. I can’t
just straight away say whatever that’s in my mind because I need to filter
first. Or else, you would say that I’m terrible at giving advice, I’m making
things worse, I’m making you feel worse and so on. Talking to/trying to
communicate with you makes me feel so exhausted. Please don’t get me wrong, I’m
not saying that you are at fault or something because you are not.
So yeah.. Why
should I allow myself to feel all these negative emotions again and again when
I should focus on feeling the positive ones? May be we shouldn't see each other again when what it does is increasing the possibilities of us hurting each other again. May be we shouldn't try to get closer when we already knew history will repeat anyway. You know
what? When you promised me that history will not repeat again, I really thought
that I could trust you and I did. But seems like it has turned out otherwise. We
really should just stay at where we are now don’t you think so? I’m sorry for
being so weak and sensitive and selfish.
Dear CT,
This is the
year that we found out, your mum and my aunt were high school besties! It’s a
small word indeed! Is this the reason why we have been besties too? Hehe..
Congratulations that you are finally about to finish your “practical attachment”!
haha I know that this year had not been an easy one for you. I could still
remember vividly how you used to complain about working for shift hours and how
you were feeling so stressed up adapting into the working environment. And, I
still remember how your “missing clothes” incident had caused you so much
distress. But see? You have made it through despite all the hardships and
“misfortunes”!! I’m so so proud of you dear seriously π
Thanks for
inviting me for the Harry Potter In Concert! I felt so bad that I couldn’t join
you guys at first but luckily the event was postponed to November and my
schedule finally allowed me to! It’s so heart-warming to see how you are
constantly making efforts to keep our friendships intact. You are always the
one initiating meetups be it attending a concert like this or having dinner
dates or just a casual chat at the cafΓ©. Though we couldn’t make it for any
gathering trip this year when everyone was having different schedules, I’m sure
that one day we will be able to make it under your lead :D
I’m glad
that you have finally come to your senses on the importance of financial
planning and give me the opportunity to serve you. I know I might not have a
lot of experience but I guess everyone starts somewhere? I really appreciate
that you are entrusting your future to me and I promise to help you the best
I could :)
Dear J,
So, you are
finally back for good! I bet you never want to leave your family here again eh?
Your friends (eg me lol) are all here and it makes meeting up so much easier
with your return. (Ya, given the fact that you can now drive to anywhere
yourself hehe) Though, we never really make it for any trip this year either
LOL
Anyway,
just wanna say thank you for your support while I was embarking on the road
less travelled. You always shared with me some of the latest trends in the
industry and gave me suggestions on how we could improve or extend our
services. You made me felt like I was not alone on this journey and I thank you
for that. And, thanks for making time to teman me shopping as well.
Actually I think shopping is not the right word. Often times, I just needed to
buy ONE thing, but ended up walking up and down the entire mall just to find
the best suit and you teman me whole day long! Haha thanks babe π
I’m sorry
that I couldn’t make it for the mini-gathering at our new primary school
campus. I know how much you were hoping to get as much people to attend as
possible and I really felt very terrible for turning you down. Glad to see that
you guys were having so much fun reliving all the old memories from like,
almost two decades ago? Omg spelling that out really scares me! How fast time
has passed eh! I hope we would have more time to catch up next year ok? J
Dear ZL,
First of
all, congratulations to you that you guys are finally settling down! And, it’s
truly my honour to be your bridesmaid (although I don’t really know what’s my
job scope LOL) You make me feel so lucky that you let me in to your life.
Seeing how you two quarrelled, having cold wars, to communicating concerns and
reconciliation, to settling down and moving in together, it means so much to
me. And, I love seeing your wedding photos!! Although we have been friends for
just like, around 5 years, you make me feel like we have known each other since
forever! Thanks for placing me in such a precious part in your heart π
I’m sorry
that this year I couldn’t spend as much time with you due to my busy schedule
but I’m glad that we made it for a short getaway!! Like finally!! Although it
was just a 2D1N trip, we have made so much wonderful memories together! I
really hope that this all-expense-paid trip was up to your expectation ‘cause
it’s like a super combo all-in-one gift from me to you XD
I’m glad
that I could be of help with your financial stuffs. It has always been the
reason why I pursued CFP, I want to help people to have better future and that
it can only be achieved if you have better financial standing. Now that you are
getting married, it becomes even more important ‘cause you guys will have
children one day. Better get ready before it’s too late. I hope you are not
finding me nagging nagging nagging LOL Anyway, I look forward to the day of
your wedding aite π
Dear LP
& S,
Congratulations
on your first kid LP!! We might not hangout often but I’m glad that we still
keep in touch! Now that you have an additional role to play, I guess you must
have been very exhausted? Need to work and need to take care of baby. Please
get enough rest and don’t over work ok? Actually right, we are staying so
nearby only, if you ever need some help or emergency, please let me know ya..
I’ll sure help if I could J
On a
separate note, it has been a great pleasure working with you, S. Embarking on
the road less taken needs so much courage and I’m glad that I had you with me.
There are so much things that I wanna talk about but I guess I would just leave
it as part of my personal diary ‘cause it’s more like a personal reflection. I
really want to apologise for everything that I’ve not done right or screwed up.
Although you kept saying that you don’t blame me, I can’t help but feel so bad
about the damage that I’ve caused. May be you are right, we can click very well
as friends but when it comes to doing business, we are so so so different, our
principles, our approaches etc.. Thanks for putting up with me and I really
have learned so much from you. I’ve never regretted taking this route and I
hope the same for you too. So yeah, we are still friends right? Must make time
to catch up ok? Wishing you all the best in the new year ahead aite :D
Dear Mr L,
I know I
might have appeared to be dodging from you since last year but I’m glad that
you still care for me and asked how I had been doing. I know you have always
talked about focus, relaxation and appreciation and I’m glad that I had the
chance to attend the meditation camp this year. Although I didn’t really
practice it on a regular basis after I came back, I’m grateful that you have
invited me to join your mediation session on a monthly basis. I’m not sure if
I’ve become more capable of managing stress or emotions but I’m sure the
effects will be more prominent as time passes?
Thanks for
giving me the opportunity to tap into your networks. Sometimes I would feel so
stress talking to so many established and successful businessmen but I’m glad
that you were there to support me all along. Everything about doing business
was so new to me and I wouldn’t have been able to hold on for so long without
your presence, sir. I know I’ve screwed up once again and I really feel very
very bad until I was sick for two weeks. But I guess everything happens for a
reason and that I must learn to move on? I hope you could still accept me for
your meditation session sir.
Dear Mr K,
I never
knew we could become close friends one day! Thanks for sharing some of your favourite songs with me and I love all of them :D I really like how we have been
catching up once in 2/3 months. We are really a very small potato only yet you
have been very patient with us, always share some insights and ideas on how we
should go about with growing our traction. Thanks for all the free tix to so
many events and even offered us free ride all the way to SG!
But it also
makes me feel very bad and guilty. You have been very kind to us hoping us to
grow and help other startups in return. You have always wanted to see us
succeed but what you are about to find out would most probably disappoint you πWe have made official announcement today on our Facebook and would remove
the page on a later date. I feel so sorry that things didn’t work out!!! I hope
that we will still be in touch? ζηηεΎεΎεΎε―ΉδΈθ΅·δ½ π
Dear Mr AL
& Mr AT,
Grateful to
have met you guys early this year. Although our business idea wasn’t something
as cool as fintech, edutech, agrotech and so on (in fact, not even close!) I
still feel very gamdong that you have been with us this one whole year. From
market validation, to testing out, to pivoting, to launching and growing, you
all have given us so much of suggestions and advice, and generously shared with
us your domain experience. Though some of those are too deep that I could
hardly grasp it, I believe that it will come in handy if I were to encounter a
certain situation in life in the future.
Besides,
thanks for having us as part of Project W. We were very excited to see what
will be some of the initiatives/events to be held towards woman empowerment. We
are very grateful that there is even a space for us to hold our meetings or
events. But I guess everyone is very busy with our own stuffs because none of
us is work-on-the-business yet? Most of us are still struggling to make ends
meet and probably that’s the reason why this Project W has not been very active
yet? Anyway, hope to see more activities to be held next year and I will definitely
try my best to be part of it J
Dear Mr A,
I’m glad
that this year round, we managed to make it for more than one catch up
sessions! Thanks for making time to meet up when we went SG and thanks for
inviting us over to your workshop. Although I can’t really understand much
because they are too much technical stuffs but being exposed to different
investment instrument and mechanisms has always been my dream and I thank you
for that J
Although I
heard that one of your projects is not working well, please know that you are a
very experience and capable person and that you will definitely pull it
through. Thanks for introducing me to few of your friends who are also in the
same space. I can only wish that I could join you guys in the game but due to regulatory
compliance I’m not allowed to. Anyway, please remember not to push yourself too
hard and must always make time for your family ok? Hope to catch up with you
again aite!
Dear Mr
CKM,
I think
this is the year that we have chatted the most? Haha I’m glad to have you along
on this unprecedented journey that I was taking. From the initial ideas to
pivoting, you were there all along. Though things didn’t work out well, you
have not given up on me, encouraged me to keep trying. You have given me so
much advice from your point of view and experience in the finance side of
business. You are also one of them who saw me rose and fell (actually, not
really consider as rose also lar lol) and I’m very thankful for that.
This is
also the year where I learned quite a lot of wine knowledge from you sir! If I
knew you resided in Perth before, I would have asked you about wine much
earlier haha One of the things I enjoy doing while scrolling Facebook is to see
you sharing places you went to for nice food and wines! I’m still a newbie and
hope that you would share more with me when we catch up one day! Oh ya, now
that we know how near our places are, that shouldn’t be much of a problem
already I guess? XD Hope that this year has been an interesting one for you sir
J
Dear
comrades,
First of
all, I’m gald that we all passed the papers and certification process!!! One year
has passed and our group chat is still as active as before hehe.. Happy to see
that you all have started practicing what we learned and it makes me wonder
what have I been doing with my life? Why haven’t I been utilising what I’ve
learned and help people around me? I was so stubborn back then that all I ever
wanted to do was to explore and experience this thing called “entrepreneurship”,
which is something that none of my family supports me to do, especially my dad.
But I still die-die wanted to do it zzzz
To be
honest, I was in cross road once again, needed to choose between my own startup
and CFP. But I guess sometimes, everything happens for a reason. There’s a
reason why my partner made that decision, and there’s a reason why regulatory
compliance tightens at this timing. May be God really has had everything
planned out for us and we just need to believe in Him. So yeah, I guess I will
most probably be joining you guys for real this time round! I’m still very new
as compared to you guys so please be my angels and guide me through ok? J
Dear Mr V,
I still
remember the first time we met LOL sorry to say this but I kinda like the way
your friends teasing you ooops XD but what makes me remember you was your
accent. To be honest, your accent is very different from most of us, you don’t
sound local, nor Taiwanese nor China-man and that’s how I remember you lol
anyway, thanks for inviting me out for fine-dine and I really enjoyed a lot watching
the sunset, the atmosphere and wine J
On a more
serious note, I want to thank you for everything that you have done. You made
an effort to register for Photoshop just because I needed it desperately back
then. You kept asking for a meetup whenever you are back in KL. You always
waited for me patiently when I was late. And, you helped grab my favourite
desserts! :D But because of all your kindness I feel I have the responsibility
to be honest with you. Not sure if you are still in a pursuit but I think we
should just let nature take its course? Remember to take care of your health ok
don’t drink too much! Catch up with you again then! Take care J
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In a nutshell, not only I've learned so much things that I wouldn't have had learned from working in the corporate, my adventure brought me to places and met and befriended a lot of interesting and successful people who are also very friendly and humble in sharing their experience and thoughts with me. Yeah, to some people, eg my parent, they would think that I've wasted this one whole year achieving nothing significant, not being productive at all, wasting life and so on, but to me, I've never regretted embarking on this very meaningful and memorable journey. Not sure if you guys know Gary Vaynerchuk but I've been following him on IG for quite some time already. I once stumbled upon one of his feeds and would like to share it here: https://www.instagram.com/p/BbwxmmYF7PE/. My self-esteem was very low when I realised my gap with my peers are widening but when I saw this video, I kinda felt better 'cause what I did, was basically to find my passion and to experience different stuffs, rather than being a slave with no soul working for payslip.
I'm not saying that working as an employee is not good, in fact it is super good because you get to feed yourself and your family! Purchasing power is so so so important and my feelings/realization for it has gotten more intense after what I've been through this whole year. So yeah, I think what I mean is, everyone has our own way of figuring out and deciding how we want to live our life. There's no right nor wrong. Ever heard of the saying, "when you write the story of your life, don't let anyone else hold the pen"? The most important thing is, we are doing what we love :)
On a separate note, am glad that I make it to the meditation camp this year. I know, I know I've mentioned it many times lol but somehow I feel like it really has its impacts on me and thus it shall not be ignored lol Hope I would be able to make it a habit to do it more frequent next year. Next, it is with regret that I still unable to do the "sirasana" post by myself yet! May be because this year my attendance to yoga class had not been as consistent as before. If my memory serves me well, I think I skipped class for Feb, May, July, Nov & Dec! May be that's why my bones now become stiff back T.T I think I really need more discipline and determination next year already and make sure that my yoga class wouldn't be affected because of work π
So yeah, there's this quote saying, "every ending marks a new beginning". With a closure on this year's chapter, it's time to anticipate a new one next year. I've made my mind to it but still feel a little bit scared and insecure because this time I will be doing it alone, full time. But, to make things better, I've signed up for one of the programmes launched by one of my idols, Jay Shetty. The programme starts from mid-Jan and lasts 5 days. Hopefully it really able to help me boost my energy for the new journey ahead! I think I need to put more effort and pray harder this year LOL π
Hope this year has been treating you good and may the years ahead be better and brighter aite!
All the best and ganbatte!! #HopeCourageStrength
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